Now I realize even more how uncertain everything is regarding carrying a child and the delivery thereof. I’m feeling kind of silly right now. It has been 3 days and the baby still resides in my womb. The doctor said I haven’t even progressed at all! I was certain things had changed! It seems impossible, but now I will lie here for 2 more weeks and wait. My neighbor, also expecting a child (and being induced today), had an interesting bit of knowledge that she gleaned from her doctor last week after having very strong contractions herself and not going into labor. Apparently the barometric pressure has an influence over labor and delivery. That would explain what I was feeling! After looking online for information on this topic I have found varying opinions. Some studies show that a sharp drop in barometric pressure leads to more deliveries than a steady barometric pressure, and other studies show that there is not a strong connection between the two. All I know is that something crazy was going on in my body at the same time as my pregnant neighbor’s, and the pressure had dropped that night. Either way, I am grateful for the chance to keep him safe for a while longer so that he can be as strong as possible at birth. Maybe he will be born at term after all!
~~Katie
Showing posts with label chicks with kidz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chicks with kidz. Show all posts
Monday, September 21, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
Waiting for Baby - Part 1
As I sit here preparing myself for the birth of my son, I think of all the other mothers-to-be who are in the same position. Some are really ready for the day to arrive after carrying the extra weight around for 40 weeks. Others, like me, are far enough along that a baby born at this time will probably be just fine (I am 34 weeks now). Still others aren’t thinking at all that their baby will be born until weeks or even months down the road, but they will arrive before anyone expects.
You see, I have experienced each of these scenarios. After undergoing in vitro fertilization, my first son was born at 23 weeks 6 days, one day before “viability”. My husband and I had known he would have cystic fibrosis after an amniocentesis was performed, and we were told by the doctors that we had to make the decision of keeping or terminating the pregnancy. We decided to fight the disease with him, and prepared ourselves, through much research and meeting with doctors, for life with a child suffering from that horrible disease.
Then, one day before going to work I noticed a change in pressure in my pelvic region. Having never been pregnant before, I just figured it was a normal change taking place. I spent the day at work as usual, but remember discussing with female colleagues the heavy feeling I was experiencing, like the baby was getting ready to come out. No one realized how accurate that feeling was. Later in the afternoon I started feeling strange sensations in my belly. They didn’t hurt, but just felt like uterine tightening that came at regular intervals. (Hello, those are contractions!)
The contractions became closer together and a little uncomfortable, and finally I decided to see if the doctor could fit me into his schedule. By the time I was seen in the doctor’s office the contractions were like clock work. Every five minutes. A non-stress test was performed but nothing registered. I knew something was happening, yet no one believed me. Finally a nurse took a look, and her words were (I still remember like it was yesterday), “All I see is membranes”. At that point she said my son would be born that night, there was no way to stop it, and he wouldn’t make it. Unfortunately she was right.
I was rushed by ambulance to a high-risk labor and delivery hospital with an excellent NICU, just in case the baby was born with a chance of survival. Magnesium sulfate was administered to stop the labor (thank goodness they don’t use that anymore), steroid shots were given (to develop the baby’s lungs), but to no avail. Later that night he was born and passed away within moments. He was tiny, perfect, and beautiful. It was a devastating loss for my husband and I, but there was some consolation in knowing he was spared from a life of pain from cystic fibrosis. Unfortunately we were lacking answers about why it happened. No one was sure if I had an incompetent cervix or if pre-term labor had been the cause of the early delivery.
You see, I have experienced each of these scenarios. After undergoing in vitro fertilization, my first son was born at 23 weeks 6 days, one day before “viability”. My husband and I had known he would have cystic fibrosis after an amniocentesis was performed, and we were told by the doctors that we had to make the decision of keeping or terminating the pregnancy. We decided to fight the disease with him, and prepared ourselves, through much research and meeting with doctors, for life with a child suffering from that horrible disease.
Then, one day before going to work I noticed a change in pressure in my pelvic region. Having never been pregnant before, I just figured it was a normal change taking place. I spent the day at work as usual, but remember discussing with female colleagues the heavy feeling I was experiencing, like the baby was getting ready to come out. No one realized how accurate that feeling was. Later in the afternoon I started feeling strange sensations in my belly. They didn’t hurt, but just felt like uterine tightening that came at regular intervals. (Hello, those are contractions!)
The contractions became closer together and a little uncomfortable, and finally I decided to see if the doctor could fit me into his schedule. By the time I was seen in the doctor’s office the contractions were like clock work. Every five minutes. A non-stress test was performed but nothing registered. I knew something was happening, yet no one believed me. Finally a nurse took a look, and her words were (I still remember like it was yesterday), “All I see is membranes”. At that point she said my son would be born that night, there was no way to stop it, and he wouldn’t make it. Unfortunately she was right.
I was rushed by ambulance to a high-risk labor and delivery hospital with an excellent NICU, just in case the baby was born with a chance of survival. Magnesium sulfate was administered to stop the labor (thank goodness they don’t use that anymore), steroid shots were given (to develop the baby’s lungs), but to no avail. Later that night he was born and passed away within moments. He was tiny, perfect, and beautiful. It was a devastating loss for my husband and I, but there was some consolation in knowing he was spared from a life of pain from cystic fibrosis. Unfortunately we were lacking answers about why it happened. No one was sure if I had an incompetent cervix or if pre-term labor had been the cause of the early delivery.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Excerpts from New Mothers Journal: 2007-2009
September 2007
I felt frustrated and ill-equipped to make the baby feel better. If I just had some basic information I knew I could make more informed decisions and stop his crying and my panic sooner. I begin to ask myself, “Is this all because I work?” Now the working mommy guilt is building.
Fortunately, in a moment of confidence, my sister in law a stay at home mom who has just had a baby confirms that I am not crazy. She too struggles to remember things. Even though she is at home all day the exhaustion and steep learning curve of new motherhood had taken it’s toll on her as well. Added to that her baby has acid reflux which requires multiple daily medications and she too is feeling equally tense and at times overwhelmed.
Between the two of us, we were frustrated, uncertain, tired and ready for a change.
I felt frustrated and ill-equipped to make the baby feel better. If I just had some basic information I knew I could make more informed decisions and stop his crying and my panic sooner. I begin to ask myself, “Is this all because I work?” Now the working mommy guilt is building.
Fortunately, in a moment of confidence, my sister in law a stay at home mom who has just had a baby confirms that I am not crazy. She too struggles to remember things. Even though she is at home all day the exhaustion and steep learning curve of new motherhood had taken it’s toll on her as well. Added to that her baby has acid reflux which requires multiple daily medications and she too is feeling equally tense and at times overwhelmed.
Between the two of us, we were frustrated, uncertain, tired and ready for a change.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Excerpts from New Mothers Journal: 2007-2009
July 2007:
It started before I even left the hospital. From the moment my son was born my ability to recall the simplest information was gone.
It took me aback really. I’d heard about mommy brain but this was ridiculous. A week ago I was managing hundreds of relationships and the top sales person in a fortune 500 company.
I thought it would get better when I got home and I was in my own surroundings. The log book I was trying to use to keep track of the feeding time the doctor had suggested I monitor was always 2 floors away, which might as well have been 200 miles away in my sleep deprived state. I felt like a pacifier too but really couldn’t remember whether it had been 15 minutes or 2 hours since his last feeding so the easiest thing to do was simply feed him again.
Fast forward 4 months and I am back to work. Somehow I am always running late. Traffic, one more client. As I am rushing in my babysitter is rushing out and I am left wondering why exactly the baby has started crying. Has he eaten recently? How much? Enough? Is he tired? Did he take good naps today? Should I put him down or let him stay up a bit? The questions swirl around in my head. Without any information it is hard to know what course of action to take to calm your little baby’s cries. Once teething started it just complicated things more as I never knew when he had last been medicated. We would all TRY to write these things down, but apparently it takes a much more organized group of people than us to do this consistently. I keep wondering are WE the ONLY ones???
to be continued.....
It started before I even left the hospital. From the moment my son was born my ability to recall the simplest information was gone.
It took me aback really. I’d heard about mommy brain but this was ridiculous. A week ago I was managing hundreds of relationships and the top sales person in a fortune 500 company.
I thought it would get better when I got home and I was in my own surroundings. The log book I was trying to use to keep track of the feeding time the doctor had suggested I monitor was always 2 floors away, which might as well have been 200 miles away in my sleep deprived state. I felt like a pacifier too but really couldn’t remember whether it had been 15 minutes or 2 hours since his last feeding so the easiest thing to do was simply feed him again.
Fast forward 4 months and I am back to work. Somehow I am always running late. Traffic, one more client. As I am rushing in my babysitter is rushing out and I am left wondering why exactly the baby has started crying. Has he eaten recently? How much? Enough? Is he tired? Did he take good naps today? Should I put him down or let him stay up a bit? The questions swirl around in my head. Without any information it is hard to know what course of action to take to calm your little baby’s cries. Once teething started it just complicated things more as I never knew when he had last been medicated. We would all TRY to write these things down, but apparently it takes a much more organized group of people than us to do this consistently. I keep wondering are WE the ONLY ones???
to be continued.....
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Kelly Ripa/TLC Show audition - part 5
continued from Monday.......
Three weeks later we received an email from a casting producer at Milojo Productions. He said that he was looking at our application and had questions about where we were in the process. What did we need help with? What obstacles were we facing while trying to bring the product to market? We were still in the running! We answered his questions and now will sit back to wait out the remaining weeks.
So far the process has been an exciting adventure. We have met intriguing women who all share a common thread: To realize their dreams no matter what the cost and effort involved. I feel we have joined this elite group who not only dream but dare to risk it all for the possibility of holding that concrete, finite thing in our hands and showing it to the entire world in the hopes it will make someone’s life better. May we all persevere and get there.
Three weeks later we received an email from a casting producer at Milojo Productions. He said that he was looking at our application and had questions about where we were in the process. What did we need help with? What obstacles were we facing while trying to bring the product to market? We were still in the running! We answered his questions and now will sit back to wait out the remaining weeks.
So far the process has been an exciting adventure. We have met intriguing women who all share a common thread: To realize their dreams no matter what the cost and effort involved. I feel we have joined this elite group who not only dream but dare to risk it all for the possibility of holding that concrete, finite thing in our hands and showing it to the entire world in the hopes it will make someone’s life better. May we all persevere and get there.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Sleep Tips for Parents of little ones
Train to Sleep: Tips for parents and their little ones
Have you ever gone a whole night without sleeping? The effects are amazing. You can go from being tired to being full of energy as you catch your “second wind”, which is eventually followed by the “crash”, which brings about short temper, frustration, anxiety. Then, if you are lucky you fall asleep before you say something you shouldn’t. It seems the same cycle happens to a lesser degree if you are not getting enough sleep. The exhaustion compounds over days and eventually, you are no fun to be around. You control your hostile temper because you have manners and you are an adult with responsibilities. But what if you weren’t? What if these were skills that you had yet to learn? What if you are just a little guy and you don’t know how to even say please and thank you, much less control your temper? What then? Melt down!
As adults we recognize that we need sleep. We generally take every opportunity to recharge so that we are better able to handle what the world throws our way. Children, on the other hand, don’t have this level of awareness.
Parents often act surprised (and a little envious) when I tell them my 2 and 4 year olds’ sleep schedules. Naps from 1:00 to 4:00, bed time between 7:30 and 8:00 and wake at 7 am. So often I hear other moms say, “I wish my little one still took naps”, or “My daughter wakes up in the middle of the night regularly”, with an exhausted sigh. So I thought I’d summarize what we do just in case it may work for you as well. My disclaimer is I am NOT a sleep expert. I am just a curious mom who has read and implemented the tips from some good books and observed some very successful (and some not-so-successful) sleep routines. Here is what I have learned:
Don’t be selfish. Even though you want to spend more time with them (and they definitely don’t want to miss a minute with you) they NEED sleep. It is your responsibility to make sure they get it. This one helped me a lot during the “training” times: You are doing a disservice to your child if you don’t make them sleep. It is for their health. Without the appropriate amount of sleep they will become more easily frustrated, have shorter attention spans and diminished motor function during the day. Don’t set your child up for failure by being the “nice guy”. They DON’T know what they need. You DO!
Move bedtime and naptimes earlier than you think, especially in the summer months. This is a difficult one as well. (Let’s face it, it is all hard!). It seems so counter intuitive that an earlier bed time would work better, but it really, really does. Once your child is overly tired it is difficult for them to not melt down at the thought of being away from you. We have found these bed times worked the best for both of our children:
Bedtimes:
· 6 months-2 years 6:45 or 7 pm.
· 2-3.5 years 7:30
· 3.5-4years 8:00*
*Unless it is a day where you have done a long outing and missed your nap, and then it is right back to 6:45 or 7:00.
Naptimes:
6 months-1 ½ 9:00 to 11:00 and 3:00 to 4:30
1 ½- 3 ½ 12:30 to 4:00
3 ½ -4 1:30-3:30
4+ 1:30 -3:30 may be sleep or quiet time in room (puzzles, books, mazes etc)
In the summer months when we are enjoying the outdoors most of the day, I actually move these times a half an hour earlier. With hot sun and the hard work in the pool, it is absolutely necessary to stay on top of the schedule. (OK. I said stay on top of the schedule in general but live a little! Don’t pass up every activity that comes along. Once in a while it is ok to vary your routine. It will likely cause a little disruption in the following days but it isn’t very practical to go to the water park for an hour and leave).
Be consistent. I know for many of us this is a killer. Sticking to this schedule means play dates can be cut short or you might not be able to sign up for that Gymboree class this time around but I promise you it will be worth it! Having a well rested child means you will have fewer tantrums and less whining. Trust me when I tell you it is worth it! Hey, maybe you can even get a nap too! I record the times of my children’s naps with the bizzyBee the baby data assistant so I know how to adjust their bedtimes. Now that they are older this is amazingly predictable but when they were younger and naps varied, the bizzyBee was essential to making sure I wasn’t asking more from them than they could give. I still find this particularly useful when I have a caregiver watching my kids for the day. By reviewing the sleep log on the bizzyBee I know whether they slept well or barely slept at all. This allows me to move that bed time up and avoid the meltdowns, all with the push of a button. If you would like more information on the bizzyBee go to http://www.chickswithkidz.com/.
“But I don’t want to go to sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” The heartbreaking sound of your child calling for you is unmatched. Anguish is the only word that describes it. It is brutal and it is best if you have someone there to support you. If you don’t have a partner who can be there with you during your training week call someone on the phone who can talk you through it. Many people will say this is cruel. I would say it is crueler to not train your child how to fall asleep. How you go about this is entirely up to you. I am a big believer in crying it out. I have watched friend after friend try other methods and eventually, after a year of frustration, they resort at some point to letting their child cry it out. If you establish self soothing from the beginning you won’t have to battle a two year old, whom I assure you kicks harder and yells louder. If you are consistent this anguish will not last more than 3-7 days. Don’t make it harder on yourself or your child by caving in. Be strong. (That said, obviously you know your child and if it sounds like they are hurting themselves in any way, go to them and seek expert advice!)
Relapse: I just finished telling you this would last a week or less. And it will. However, as your child progresses through various stages they will test you again to make sure the rules have not changed. After all, things must be different once I move to a big girl bed right? Wrong. You know the rules, you made them. Stick to them and you will be through this new test in no time.
Night Waking: This is one I struggled with the most. My immediate instinct is to bolt out of bed and run to them. It was only with the help of my husband who would grab my arm and say, “Wait,” that I was able to give the kids a chance to work it out themselves - which they did generally very quickly. That said, you know the difference between grumbling in the night and the sounds of nightmares. I believe, and this is just my opinion, that if your child is truly afraid (which any parent can tell by their voices) that you should go to them and comfort them so they know you will always be there should they REALLY need you.
In summary, different things work for different people. I don’t propose to know everything there is to know about sleep. This is simply advice that proved to be useful in getting my little ones to rest. I hope by passing it on, others out there might get a good night’s sleep too. Good luck!
Have you ever gone a whole night without sleeping? The effects are amazing. You can go from being tired to being full of energy as you catch your “second wind”, which is eventually followed by the “crash”, which brings about short temper, frustration, anxiety. Then, if you are lucky you fall asleep before you say something you shouldn’t. It seems the same cycle happens to a lesser degree if you are not getting enough sleep. The exhaustion compounds over days and eventually, you are no fun to be around. You control your hostile temper because you have manners and you are an adult with responsibilities. But what if you weren’t? What if these were skills that you had yet to learn? What if you are just a little guy and you don’t know how to even say please and thank you, much less control your temper? What then? Melt down!
As adults we recognize that we need sleep. We generally take every opportunity to recharge so that we are better able to handle what the world throws our way. Children, on the other hand, don’t have this level of awareness.
Parents often act surprised (and a little envious) when I tell them my 2 and 4 year olds’ sleep schedules. Naps from 1:00 to 4:00, bed time between 7:30 and 8:00 and wake at 7 am. So often I hear other moms say, “I wish my little one still took naps”, or “My daughter wakes up in the middle of the night regularly”, with an exhausted sigh. So I thought I’d summarize what we do just in case it may work for you as well. My disclaimer is I am NOT a sleep expert. I am just a curious mom who has read and implemented the tips from some good books and observed some very successful (and some not-so-successful) sleep routines. Here is what I have learned:
Don’t be selfish. Even though you want to spend more time with them (and they definitely don’t want to miss a minute with you) they NEED sleep. It is your responsibility to make sure they get it. This one helped me a lot during the “training” times: You are doing a disservice to your child if you don’t make them sleep. It is for their health. Without the appropriate amount of sleep they will become more easily frustrated, have shorter attention spans and diminished motor function during the day. Don’t set your child up for failure by being the “nice guy”. They DON’T know what they need. You DO!
Move bedtime and naptimes earlier than you think, especially in the summer months. This is a difficult one as well. (Let’s face it, it is all hard!). It seems so counter intuitive that an earlier bed time would work better, but it really, really does. Once your child is overly tired it is difficult for them to not melt down at the thought of being away from you. We have found these bed times worked the best for both of our children:
Bedtimes:
· 6 months-2 years 6:45 or 7 pm.
· 2-3.5 years 7:30
· 3.5-4years 8:00*
*Unless it is a day where you have done a long outing and missed your nap, and then it is right back to 6:45 or 7:00.
Naptimes:
6 months-1 ½ 9:00 to 11:00 and 3:00 to 4:30
1 ½- 3 ½ 12:30 to 4:00
3 ½ -4 1:30-3:30
4+ 1:30 -3:30 may be sleep or quiet time in room (puzzles, books, mazes etc)
In the summer months when we are enjoying the outdoors most of the day, I actually move these times a half an hour earlier. With hot sun and the hard work in the pool, it is absolutely necessary to stay on top of the schedule. (OK. I said stay on top of the schedule in general but live a little! Don’t pass up every activity that comes along. Once in a while it is ok to vary your routine. It will likely cause a little disruption in the following days but it isn’t very practical to go to the water park for an hour and leave).
Be consistent. I know for many of us this is a killer. Sticking to this schedule means play dates can be cut short or you might not be able to sign up for that Gymboree class this time around but I promise you it will be worth it! Having a well rested child means you will have fewer tantrums and less whining. Trust me when I tell you it is worth it! Hey, maybe you can even get a nap too! I record the times of my children’s naps with the bizzyBee the baby data assistant so I know how to adjust their bedtimes. Now that they are older this is amazingly predictable but when they were younger and naps varied, the bizzyBee was essential to making sure I wasn’t asking more from them than they could give. I still find this particularly useful when I have a caregiver watching my kids for the day. By reviewing the sleep log on the bizzyBee I know whether they slept well or barely slept at all. This allows me to move that bed time up and avoid the meltdowns, all with the push of a button. If you would like more information on the bizzyBee go to http://www.chickswithkidz.com/.
“But I don’t want to go to sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” The heartbreaking sound of your child calling for you is unmatched. Anguish is the only word that describes it. It is brutal and it is best if you have someone there to support you. If you don’t have a partner who can be there with you during your training week call someone on the phone who can talk you through it. Many people will say this is cruel. I would say it is crueler to not train your child how to fall asleep. How you go about this is entirely up to you. I am a big believer in crying it out. I have watched friend after friend try other methods and eventually, after a year of frustration, they resort at some point to letting their child cry it out. If you establish self soothing from the beginning you won’t have to battle a two year old, whom I assure you kicks harder and yells louder. If you are consistent this anguish will not last more than 3-7 days. Don’t make it harder on yourself or your child by caving in. Be strong. (That said, obviously you know your child and if it sounds like they are hurting themselves in any way, go to them and seek expert advice!)
Relapse: I just finished telling you this would last a week or less. And it will. However, as your child progresses through various stages they will test you again to make sure the rules have not changed. After all, things must be different once I move to a big girl bed right? Wrong. You know the rules, you made them. Stick to them and you will be through this new test in no time.
Night Waking: This is one I struggled with the most. My immediate instinct is to bolt out of bed and run to them. It was only with the help of my husband who would grab my arm and say, “Wait,” that I was able to give the kids a chance to work it out themselves - which they did generally very quickly. That said, you know the difference between grumbling in the night and the sounds of nightmares. I believe, and this is just my opinion, that if your child is truly afraid (which any parent can tell by their voices) that you should go to them and comfort them so they know you will always be there should they REALLY need you.
In summary, different things work for different people. I don’t propose to know everything there is to know about sleep. This is simply advice that proved to be useful in getting my little ones to rest. I hope by passing it on, others out there might get a good night’s sleep too. Good luck!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
